Welcome to the world Billy Pax and Matt

We made it to 31 weeks exactly on 11/18/14. After 2 weeks of labor and massive amounts of fluid build up from baby B (AKA William Pax), my body couldn't hold off any more. I won't go into the massive ways my body was shutting down, but it was very bad. It's called Mirror Syndrome and it happens with hydrops. Bily's hydrops never resolved and his left lung never developed. The docs tried and he lived for 10 days, but in the end they couldn't get his lungs to support his little body. He died in our arms on 11/28/14. ............................................................................................................................... His twin brother, baby A, Matt, is doing very well. He faces all the challenges of a preemie, but has faced no additional challenges. His breathing is great, his growth is fine and he's taking his feeds well by ng tube. Hopefully, over the next few weeks, he'll start waking up more and taking more feeds by mouth. He's 34 weeks now, so maybe in the next 3-4 weeks, he'll be able to come home.

Update 24 weeks

I'm 24 weeks today. Sorry about the lack of updates, but it's been a hard few months. Everything looked great until our 18 week appointment. We then found out my cervix was funneling and shortening. My cervix was at 1.8 cm when it should be at 4 cm. even worse, we found out baby B was very sick. He has hydrops. Hydrops is when fluid accumulates through out the body for various reasons. It's more of a symptom than a diagnosis. They checked all of the usual suspects, but it remains unknown why baby B is accumulating fluid. Specifically, the fluid is accumulating around his left lung and abdomen. Because of this his left lung has been unable to grow and the massive amount of fluid has pushed his heart from the left to the center of his chest. This has also put pressure on his right lung compromising it's growth. The primary susoects are a chylothorax (a leak in the lymph system) or an inherent genetic metabolic disorder whcih would almost certainly be incompatible with life. Everyone recommended terminating B to give A a better chance and since they felt B wasn't going to make it anyways. We decided against that for a number of reasons. One main one was that terminating B can cause the loss of the whole pregnancy 10-15% of the time. We just couldn't take that risk with A's life. i ...... ................................................................................................................................................................................................................ But, back to the cervix.... We decided to do a cerclage. The doc was able to put in 2 stitches one above the other. We also started progesterone shots. I started these on my own. I had read plenty of studies and there seemed to be a low risk, high reward factor. In the upcoming weeks my cervix continued shortening. It is now just above the cerclage, but the stitch is holding and it has been stable since about 20 weeks. ................................................................................................................................................................................................................ So, we've gone back on a regular basis and each time we check, everything looks essentially the same. Cervix is poor, but stable. B is alive and the fluid remains about the same. A looks great overall. They both continue to grow on track and A is about 4 days ahead on growth and B is about a day ahead on growth. My current hospital, Hinsdale, really doesn't have the skills, equipment or will to help us fight for B. University of Chicago appears to have more fight in them, but Cincinnati Children's Hospital has the skills to help B. They're the only place in the region that can do fetal surgery to possibly put in a shunt in B's chest to drain the fluid and give his lungs a chance to grow before birth. I don't know if they'll do it. We always have to consider the risk to A and fetal surgery certainly posses a risk to the entire pregnancy. We think there will be a good time to try it. But, of course, the pressure on B's heart from the fluid on his lungs could cause it to stop at anytime. So, there is a lot of wait and see. .................................................................................................................................................................................................................... But, for now we're 24 weeks and we've reached the age of viability. We're not having any contractions. I've been on bedrest since 18 weeks and that seems to be keeping everything calm. But, obviously, 24 weeks is not optimal for birth. And, if born now, B will certainly not survive. And, A will have a very long road with no certainty of survival. Everybody needs to stay inside for as long as possible. And, so we wait...

14 weeks tomorrow

MaterniT21 results are in!

Negative for everything.  So, neither baby has a genetic abnormality.  Whew!  What a relief.

Next step, the level 2 ultrasound.  We'll do that as soon as we can at 18 weeks.  They stated if they couldn't see everything, we may have to come back at 22 weeks.  That's fine with me!

Ultrasound date is 8/19/14.

12 weeks

Yes, yes. I haven't updated in a while. Things are crazy. As of Monday, both beans were still alive and measuring 6 days ahead. Woohoo!!!! Heartbeats were 175 and 160. There's been a lot of scares along the way. Too many to list here. We should get the MaterniT21 results in the next 2 weeks and then the biggest obstacle is the 20 week anatomy scan. I think if we get through both of those, I just might start believing. 

So, here they are: 
A:

 

 

And B:  

 

Second Ultrasound

The second ultrasound on Monday, June 9, 2014 at 7w6d shows: 

2 heartbeats at 177 and 178 measuring 8w1d and 7w6d.  (17.6 mm and 15.7 mm)

Whew! 

Next ultrasound at 9w3d on Friday, June 20th. 

First Ultrasound

Thursday, May 29, 2014 Ultrasound

6 weeks 2 days

And, the results are: 

2 heartbeats.  Each in their own gestational sacs.  Whew!  Measuring perfectly at 6w2d and 6w1d and heartbeats are 121 and 120. 

There might have been a third gestational sac that never really formed.  It's hard to tell and it really doesn't matter.  But, it would explain the wonky betas.  Let's hope that's it. 

We have a long race ahead of us, but it's a very good start. 

Without further ado, here's the pictures: 

 

I can't figure out how to turn this one, but either way, they're the same picture. 

 

Next ultrasound will be Monday, June 9th.  We'll be 7w 6d. 

IVF #4 The POAS Journey

Wednesday, May 7, 2014 - 8 days past retrieval (DPO) and 3 days past 5 day transfer (3dp5dt):
In the past I've had lingering trigger on this day and the next, so a + might mean nothing. 

It look pretty negative to me.  There might be the faintest hint of a shadow. 

But, that's probably the trigger. 

 Thursday, May 8, 2014 - 9 DPO and 4dp5dt: 

Is that the faintest hint of a +?  Can you see it?  It could still be the trigger.  I've been fooled by the trigger before.  Tomorrow will tell. 





Friday, May 9, 2014 - 10 DPO and 5dp5dt: 

Hhhmmm.  Well, that's a line. 

 Saturday, May 10, 2014 - 11 DPO and 6dp5dt:

That's definitely a darker line. 

 Sunday, May 11, 2014 - 12  DPO and 7dp5dt: 

THAT is a gorgeous line!

Monday, May 12, 2014 - 13 DPO and 8dp5dt:  Didn't test. 


Tuesday, May 13, 2014 - 14 DPO and 8dp5dt:

It's starting to make the control line light.  Beta today.  I'm guessing it'll be between 300-400. 

And the beta is.........


385.  (I'll pat myself on the back a little for the correct guess and being able to read HPTs.  :)  )

Progesterone at 97. 


And the second beta at 16 DPO will be great, too, right?
No. It's not. Because life is never easy for me like that.
The second beta is 662.
Let me do the math for you. That's a 61 hour doubling time, which, of course, sucks.

I know, I know, vanishing twin/triplet, anything could be going on, blah, blah, blah.
But, really, we're done. No more betas, no super early ultrasound. We'll be doing an ultrasound on Thursday, May 29, 2014 at 6w2d. Either there will be a heartbeat or there won't. I'll let you know.